Oct 28, 2010

I fixed the comments on the blog!

Do mind the hyperbole regarding my intelect but. . . I am a freaking prodigy or something.

For far too long this blog has been without it's comment section. I recieved many* complaints from my many* readers because they all just desperately wanted to leave their two cents among mine on this blog.

Well complain and quip and leave as many LOL's as you please because the comment section is back. It also has a word verification thing you have to go through for every comment. It doesn't have to be there, it just is because I find them annoying and I am the only one who can comment without having to go through it. Tremble at my power.

There are also lots of other little buttons that have showed up with the working comment one. I don't know what half of them do but it will be fun to find out.

That was a fun post full of exaggeration and sarcasm.


*many in this scenario means something completely different and much less impressive than what you are used to.

Oct 27, 2010

Why, hello dynamic duo!

I do believe I have a bit of an Angus and Julia Stone obsession. If you have not been able to come to this conclusion by default yourself then you are clearly no Sherlock Holmes. If you don't have a degree in medicine, you are no Doctor John Watson either. Guess you'll have to relate yourself to some other character from English literature.

The reason I bring up the musical Stone siblings is because they both have solo albums. Today when I bought Julia's album and listened to the whole thing right through, then went on myspace and listened to Angus's solo album right through, I had to wonder why they would part ways musically.

I know I wouldn't always want my name to just be the extension of my sibling's name. I get enough "Hey aren't you Matt's sister?" at school. Of course when they ask that I say "No Matt is my brother" and walk on while they give me the weirdest look of confusion ever.

I'm not trying to say Angus and Julia were fools for going solo, I am just trying to complain that their together stuff was better than their not together stuff. I must be in a complaining mood, I mean did you see that last sentence? It read like it was typed by an illiterate child rather than the literary rock star I am.

I listened to their solo albums and, while I did enjoy them (except for the two tracks where Angus tried to be a rock star from the 80's and failed miserably) I enjoyed the two songs from their partnered days I listened to after a little bit more. They were two songs I hadn't heard before so you can't say I am biased by enjoying songs that I have enjoyed many times before. That's right judgemental people. I thought of everything.

I am done complaining now. I am onto the next stop my train of thought took while I was listening to those lovely Australian tunes. Keeping up? I think this is a high speed, multiple carriage train of thought. I also recently had a frozen coke so that might explain my rapid subject change. The Silver Frozen Coke* has been unleashed, I guess.

On to the subject change. All this referring to the dynamic duo in my thoughts got me referring to them as the dynamic duo rather than Angus and Julia Stone. Even in my head I get tired of using all those syllables. Then I got thinking "How many awesome, dynamic duo's are there?" I know of many, within music, television, film and even in my own life.

Where would Angus be without his Julia? Trying to be an 80's rock star. It may haunt me. Where would Julia be without her Angus? Making many very nice slow songs with nice lyrics and nice album art, but no wistfully tortured ballads or songs that wish to pick up the pace. Where would Buzz be without Woody? Still trying to reach star command. Where would Woody be without Buzz? On display in a Woody's round up museum in Tokyo.

Dynamic duo's manage to work for us. They tug at the heart strings, they make us relate, they remind us that humans do have superpowers, one being friendship. Gosh that last one was so cheesy I feel obliged to put this here.
Cheese and Biscuits! That can be number one on our list of dynamic duo's.

Holmes and Watson

can anyone say 'Classic duo?'. I can. I can spell it too. Didn't need spell check or anything. It's OK to be impressed.

Sherlock Holmes: You have the grand gift of silence, Watson; it makes you quite invaluable as a companion.

[Watson punches him in the face]

Lois and Clark.
I tried to keep the super heroes to a minimum because of my last really long, superhero heavy post. Can't deny this dynamic duo their spotlight though.

Lois Lane: And let's get something straight, I did not work my buns off to become an investigative reporter for the Daily Planet just to baby-sit some hack from Nowheresville! And another thing, you are not working with me, you are working for me. I call the shots, I ask the questions. You are low man - I am top banana and that's the way I like it, comprende?

Clark Kent: You like to be on top. Got it.

Castle and Beckett.
Now would I be a hardcore Castle fan without mentioning the self proclaimed ruggedly handsome, literary rock star and his inspiration? Can't help but love it when the dynamic duo are completely opposite. Not to mention when there is murder involved. I love this show.

Richard Castle: When I'm writing a new character, there's no telling when inspiration might strike.

Kate Beckett: I thought I was your inspiration.

Richard Castle: Oh you are, detective, and in so many ways.

Kate Beckett: Yeah, well, your inspiration might strike you sooner than you think.

Wayne and Garth
Wayne's world! Wayne's world! Party Time! Excellent! Love their solid friendship. No matter how ridonkulous** things get, they always have each other's backs.

Garth Algar: Did you ever find Bugs Bunny attractive when he put on a dress and played girl bunny?
Wayne Campbell: No.
[cracks up laughing]
Wayne Campbell: No.
Garth Algar: Neither did I. I was just asking

Buzz and Woody
Spaceman? Cowboy? Space cowboy?! I knew there was a reason this combination just bursts with AWESOME!

Woody: All right, that's enough! Look, we're all - *very* impressed with Andy's new toy.
Buzz: Toy?
Woody: T-O-Y, t-oy.
Buzz: Excuse me, I think the word you're searching for is "space ranger".
Woody: The word I'm searching for, I can't say, because there's preschool toys present

Brennen (Bones) and Booth
More awesome team ups with complete opposites that involves murder. I wonder why it is on directly before Castle on Sunday. . .

Booth: Did you know that giraffes can weigh up to two tons?
Bones: Yes. Everyone knows that.
Booth: And they sleep less than two hours a day.
Bones: That I did not know.
Booth: Yes! Pinky stumps The Brain!

Bret and Jemaine (flight of the conchords)
Kiwi musicians that can't catch a break? Gotta love it. Their songs are absolutely hilarious.

Bret: I would never go out with an Australian!
Jemaine: But if you were to, I would be fine with it.
Bret: When I first met you you tried to have me deported from New Zealand because you thought I was an Australian.
Jemaine: That was a misunderstanding; you were wearing a vest top.
Bret: My mum gave me that; thought it made me look like Bruce Willis.
Jemaine: Well it didn’t, it made you look like an Australian

Spongebob and Patrick
Last but not least, the best friends to live under the sea. They are the most up-beat delusional buddies there are.

Spongebob: What do you usually do when I’m gone?
Patrick: Wait for you to come back

There you have it a very long blog post fueled by Frozen coke. Hope you enjoyed it. Just to make sure there are no misunderstandings. . . I still love Angus and Julia Stone's solo work. In fact, I listened to the whole Julia album several times while writing this. Anyway I'm done!


*if you reveal The Silver Frozen Coke's secret identity you will have to face the point of her shiny sword! Also her wrath. Also a few sentences in which she refers to herself in the third person.

**I am trying to use the word ridonkulous as many times as possible. Lots of fun.

Oct 25, 2010

There aint' no denyin' it folks, this sentence is a gramatical nightmare.

Face book is fun isn't it? My friend put as her status on face book, the following:
What is your Superhero name? (2nd favorite color + favorite drink, and add "THE" at the beginning)

Naturally I wrote The Silver Frozen Coke. Then I got thinking, imagine if I were the silver frozen coke. I couldn't help myself after that. I got carried away.It went from "What would my superhero name be" to "What would my powers be" to "What would my costume be" and it just escalated from there. So I thought I would use this train of thought to practice that free writing I mentioned before the train got de-railed.

If I were The Silver Frozen Coke I would be like Popeye the sailor man, but rather than downing cans of spinach to activate my incredible powers, I would down large frozen cokes. My name and outfit would be connected in a heartbeat, from my silver cape and boots to the shiny utility belt around my waist. I would be armed with an awesome sword, a rapier, the kind pirates use.

When the call for help is heard I will chug down my super power juice of frozen coke and be on my way to save the day. Running faster than a speeding superman on a sugar high, I would swoop in with my crazy hyped up energy and strike down whoever dare cross me and my blade.

[note: not actually me at any point in my life it was just the funniest thing google came up with when I wrote 'female superhero' in the search box]

. . . . Bored. Anyway I'll just fill the rest of this with pictures of my favorite superhero/villain combinations.

Superman and Lex Luthor. Superman is a legend. Lex Luthor is relentlessly self centered and evil. Allow the feuding to ensue.

Captain Hammer and Dr. Horrible. If you have never heard of these two, go to youtube and search Dr. Horrible's sing along blog. Best waste of time ever. It is one instance where you will like the villain better than the hero.

Batman And the Joker. Let's face it, I just absolutely love Batman the dark knight because Heath Ledger made an awesome lunatic. Rest in peace dude!

Captain Malcolm Reynolds and 'The Operative'. I just wouldn't be a nerd If I didn't mention the coolest hero of them all now would I? Space cowboys rock.

Though I think I should mention one of the other completely twisted villains from this show called Niska. He is Russian and has torture toys. Need I say more?

I guess I do. I couldn't find a picture of Niska and his torture toys so I put up that one. No relevence whatsoever.


Oct 24, 2010

Hate being sick

I have to make myself blog more, and about more interesting topics. Lately my posts seem to have been empty of meaning and marginally uninteresting, to me anyway. I remember my earlier posts were deep and meaningful. . . sort of. Guess I'm just getting bored or running out of things to say.

I was reading a book, all weekend, and in it there was mention of a Stephen King novel about a writer. When the writer got stuck he would free-write in a way that involved him practically conversing with himself on paper. He would start by asking "What are you looking for?" or something like that then would continue the conversation with himself on paper until he uncovered something from his subconscious that would get him back on track.

I thought it was pretty cool, in a multiple personality kind of way. The whole idea of this free writing thing is to just write whatever comes into ones head without stopping. Sure the result isn't always worthy of any ones time but at least it gets words on paper. Or in this case, on screen.

I'm at the point when what I am writing doesn't matter just the fact that I am writing at all. I don't want to leave a blank screen on my computer every time I open up my blog. I would have it open, stare at the blank title box, glance down at the blank page then slide the mouse up to one of the other tabs and click away from blogger to face book or twitter or mylifeisaverage.com.

Depending on how many updates there are on face book or twitter I usually glance back at the blogger page once or twice but if I am on mylifeisaverage.com I rarely return to the blog for any reason but to close it and tell myself that I will update on another day. If you have never been to www.mylifeisaverage.com, go there now. Or finish reading this then go there. That would probably be better since once you go there you will more than likely be entertained for hours.

Today I realised that I had gotten slack with my blogging. Just now I realise that last sentence sounded like a post on MLIA. I don't even remember where I was going with this when I started. Maybe I should stop this post and lie down or something.

For no reason here is a picture of a T-shirt I think is awesome.

It says "Speakerphone. Not nearly as fun as the alternative."


Oct 23, 2010

Random scribbles

We are not held to earth by gravity
That wore off long ago
Our shadows are just so accustomed to life on the ground
that they keep us there with them
That is why when we leap, we fall
Were it not for the shadows stitched to our toes,
no one would be able to say we can't fly


Oct 22, 2010

What an odd creature.

Have you ever seen a platypus? It is an extremely random animal and if you ever see one it is difficult to believe such a thing can exist out side a myth. It has the tail of a beaver, the bill of a duck, the feet of an otter, lays eggs like a bird but is a mammal, and the males even have a poisonous barb in their foot.

Why is it that creatures as random as the platypus, the narwhal, or even the camel exist, yet creatures like unicorns, or even gremlins, can't? If someone says they saw a platypus at the zoo people won't think twice but if you say you saw a unicorn they will think you are crazy.

Unless of coarse you explain that rhinos are actually unicorns that have let themselves go a bit.


Oct 18, 2010

Tim Burton, you have much to teach us.

Braces for your teeth are weird. The whole process is awkward, uncomfortable and just plain odd. Yesterday I came into the orthodontists, lay back in the fancy chair, wore the fancy sunglasses and they got to work.

I think the most uncomfortable thing about the process was the plastic things that held my lips apart. They stretched my cheeks and made me look ridiculous. Then they got to work covering my teeth with weird glue and sticking the little metal clamps to each individual tooth. To finish off they threaded a wire through the clamps. The unusual contraption attached to my teeth is meant to straighten them.

When described like this, don't braces sound completely random? Who on earth would think to create a device that sits in ones mouth for more than a year in order to straighten ones teeth? It sounds like something from a Tim Burton film. Edward scissorhands had nasty metal contraptions on his fingers so, if you think about it, metal teeth isn't such a far stretch from one of Tim Burton's works of art.


Oct 7, 2010

Lame movies.

Second week of the school holidays has come far too soon. Can't they just drag on forever so I don't have to ever do school work, assignments, exams or actually speak to teachers?

I remember the days when the end of the holidays was practically a god send. Those were primary school holidays for you. The holidays would start, I would maybe have some plans for the first week or so, but after a little while the days would drag on.

I'd lose track of what day it was, thinking Wednesday was Friday and Saturday was Thursday somehow. Now I see the losing track of days as blissful ignorance that fuels a relaxed break from that hell hole they call school.

I suppose school isn't that bad, but I might just be saying that because it has been almost a week and a half since I have had to deal with it. Some more of that blissful ignorance working for me.

I remember what drove me insane the most, back in the primary school days when I actually got over being on holiday, was the extremely lame movies they always play at lunchtime on channel seven.

Weather it is a story about a dog saving the world, a little boy getting lost on a mountain trail, or a kid born with a condition that causes calcium build up in the skull making him look like he'd face planted into a moving train (I'm serious that was the plot of a midday movie I saw once), the midday movies on channel seven are always fun to laugh at.

Apparently, according to my dad at least, there are sometimes decent midday movies. . . . . Right. I'll believe that when I see it.

All I know is that when I was in primary school the lack of interesting action on TV during the day made me go crazy enough to not be devastated at returning to school. You are a fool, past-me! You should have lazed about and sucked up every ounce of your freedom! Or better yet, you should have constructed a Tardis out of a handy refrigerator box so you could bring me back to those times so I could enjoy the holidays for you!

. . . . OK, you know you have been sitting in the house watching lame movies for too long when you start having figurative conversations with your past self.

-Rachel gone mad